Monday, December 29, 2003

Jennifer Knapp, "Martyrs and Thieves"

There are a lot of songs that I enjoy for a long time before I understand what they mean. "Martyrs and Thieves" was one of those. It didn't quite make sense until I began to understand what it was to be weak, and then it came alive for me so much that I printed out the lyrics and affixed them to my desk for encouragement.

The way I interpret it, in the first verse Jennifer writes about how one's own hopes, enemies and admirers can make a person feel weak.

There's a place in the darkness that I used to cling to,
It presses harsh hope against time.
In the absence of martyrs there's a presence of thieves
Who only want to rob you blind
They steal away any sense of peace
Though I'm a king I'm a king on my knees
And I know they are wrong when they say I am strong as the darkness covers me.


But I think Jennifer's song moves on from these painful thoughts to the humble exultation of a person who has learned that when they are weak, they are strong. The chorus proceeds:

So turn on the light and reveal all the glory
I am not afraid
To bear all my weakness, knowing in meekness
I have a kingdom to gain.


As it progesses the lyrics get more poignant, candid and eloquent. I think many a mature Christian could say, like Jennifer does, "there are ghosts from the past who've owned more of my soul than I thought I had given away." We know, and God sees that we have been "great fools" who, like the prodigal son, have "squandered 'til pallid and thin." Because of this, I too "have never been much for the baring of soul in the presence of any man." In light of the pending judgement of men, Ms. Knapp asks a question to which she knows the answer.

Could it be that my worth should depend
By the crimson stained grace on a hand?


Then, coming to the conclusion that is was never her own strength that made her worthy, the artist prays,

And like a lamp on a hill, Lord I pray in your will
To reveal all of you that I can.


Psalm 119:54 says, "Thy statues are my songs in the house of my pilgrimage." Songs like these are spiritual guideposts for me. They mark a path other believers have walked, and they help me understand what God is trying to teach me.

"Martyrs and Thieves" is on Jennifer Knapp's album Kansas, released by Gotee Records in 1998.

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