It has become a feeling less foreboding and more comforting: the power of Christ's love.
It was foreboding because I began to recognize a pattern: He would affirm His love for me, spiritually, on days when I ended up making a big mistake. Once I saw a pattern, I began to fear the revelation of that power because it meant I'd make a mistake.
Lately, I've come to realize that I am going to make mistakes, and feel more grateful for His love. Because of His love, I can go on when I fail. Only because of His love can I go on in the ways He directs, because otherwise I would feel ruined. His love is what keeps me going on, and its power works through my selfish heart to love others. It can overpower my peevishness, my fatigue and my disinterest to create compassion where there was none.
Oh God, You are My God
And I will ever praise You!
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step you'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days.
Amen!
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